I Started Writing This, But Saw Something Shiny

Here we are on day two of looking at some of the issues we have encountered with any of our five kids.  If there were a poster family for ADHD, we might be it.  You should see me trying to write this post!

Starting with my parents, there is not one in my family of origin or current family whom ADHD hasn’t given a big fat squeeze! When you are raised by and with people who have ADHD, it is like water to a fish: I just don’t know any differently. Doesn’t it take your family four hours to leave the house? I thought everyone had trouble with being on time, remembering why they are where they are, knowing they are forgetting something, and having no idea how long any particular task takes. I thought spaghetti-like conversations were the mark of being female because there are so few men in my family.  I thought losing things like keys, wallets, and important papers was common for everyone. I never examined why everyone I am related to is always procrastinating, thriving on self-imposed deadlines, and swinging from hyper-focused to being incapable of finishing anything.  I didn’t know I had ADHD. And then I moved 2000 miles away.

Separated from my ultra-ADHD family members, I started to see myself in a new light.  Flitting from one topic to another during conversation, or one task to another didn’t look so normal. Suddenly, my behavior—and my daughter’s exasperation—finally clued me in that I might share this diagnosis.

And guess what? ALL FIVE of our children have signs of attention deficit.  God chose so well for us!  This is one we know and embrace! When we homeschooled our son, I read to him while he did flips or hung upside down on the couch. Observers doubted his comprehension or retention.  How could anyone pick up on my words with that much activity?  We lovers of people with ADHD know that the truth is that if all his attention went to holding still, he would have none left over for listening. And today you will always find him with little Lego figures in his pocket so he can fidget whenever he needs to.

We can make these accommodations for all our children.  It is a perk of homeschooling to arrange the day to help our kids be successful, turning something like ADHD into an asset!  We alternate active and quiet activities and provide ‘busy hands’ when there is a need to be more still.  The girls illustrate what I read, play with fidgets, sit on inflated textured pillows so they can wiggle in a smaller space, or snuggle under weighted blankets.

Outside of school, we watch their faces and body language to see when we need to intervene before they run into a virtual wall.  We have breathing games to help them slow their brains down. Charts are around the house to help the girls stay on track with various routines. And big, active, or heavy movement is worked into every day.

It took me three and a half hours to write this. I distracted myself. Four daughters took turns interrupting me with their needs.  My husband came and went. And I distracted myself.  By the way, my little series may be interrupted by other posts because focusing on one theme is difficult for this gal!