Another Fun Attachment Activity

We are always looking for fun ways to attach and build a family identity.  After reading The Connected Parent and Understanding Attachment Injuries, we started a year-long activity of writing down memories on strips of paper and adding them to a vase.  We were supposed to go through them on New Year’s Eve, but I forgot! So, we are pulling a few every dinner time.

In truth, we started the tradition before I read the books because the girls had a difficult time remembering things.  The books underscored the importance of establishing a way to recall activities and events to strengthen memory skills in kids who may have subconsciously trained themselves not to remember events.  This tradition also helps highlight the wonderful family we are building together.  

The phrase ‘the days are long, but the years are short’ is so true when the days are filled with the tedium and hard work of creating healthy routines and rhythms.  The good can be easily forgotten amid late-stage potty training, sleepless nights, tantrums, and math drills. 

But there is so much good!  Reading the memories aloud and looking around the table as eyes widen in joy is rewarding!  Voices rise as the memory unfolds and details spill out.  There is a double blessing when we do this: we are creating yet another memory. It’s about family members looking into one another’s eyes, cooperating to complete the minutiae of the memory, and making nearly tangible warmth.  This tradition is a keeper!

An unexpected bonus is to my own mental health.  I need to fill that vase, so I am compelled to live with a mindset that rises above those tedious or exhausting days.  While the day trips to the zoo or science museum are included, so are the little moments of playing Uno together, snuggling up to watch TV, and the nightly bedtime routine.  These are special moments that define our family, and it is good for me to remember that.